We all get stressed, actually must of us live with high levels of chronic stress that have a negative impact on our health but, have you stopped for a moment and think how many times that stress comes from things or situations that are out of our hands? Things we cannot control?
We all want to have a sense of control or at least make possible scenarios of what could possibly happen on a certain situation, for some reason we think that if we have control over every single person and situation then we can avoid bad things to happen or we think that by worrying and thinking about the worst result and thinking about the negative outcomes we can be prepared and know how to respond or we can be safe.
The truth is that we´ll never have total control over everything that is going on and every person and wanting to have everything under control only increases stress.
Even simple things like what other people think and say of you can increase stress and you don´t have control over that. This example keeps so many of us worried and lead to stress especially if we want to please everyone which is impossible, one of the reasons this increases stress is because we´re hiding who we really are so that we can fit in.
Also simple situations like raining or getting stuck on traffic because of an accident are situations we cannot control, we cannot decide when we want to rain and when not and we do not have control over accidents so what we can do is be prepared or sometimes the best things we can do is remain calm and accept there´s nothing we can do and the worst we see the situation the worst everything we´ll get.
There are some steps we can take to make sure that we do not get stressed with things that are out of our hands, here are those steps:
1.- Identify what you can control and what you cannot
2.- Accept that there are some things that are out of your hand and there´s nothing you can do
3.- Identify the real reason why certain things or situations keep you worried, sometimes our mind creates different negative scenarios or results which are not true
4.- Focus on the things you can control, make sure that you don´t waste mental energy and time on the situations and people you cannot control and focus all that energy and time on the things you do have control.
When you focus on the things you can control you usually get great results and you also stop your mind from creating negative scenarios. Since you can only focus on one activity at a time and hold one thought at a time you only need to focus all your attention and concentrate completely on the activity you can control to reduce stress and make sure that you get the best outcome possible.
If you´re going to be in a situation where you know there are some things you cannot control try to have a plan that helps you respond the best way possible, especially if you tend to focus on the stuff you cannot control, have a plan or strategy that helps you stay focus on the things you can control.
Also when you accept that there will always be things out of your hands you can concentrate on working as hard as you can and giving your best, knowing that you did everything you can on what you can control makes you feel satisfied with the result and stop blaming yourself for something that didn´t end as planned especially if that something was out your hands.
We all tend to live with high levels of chronic stress so finding ways and strategies we can reduce help us improve our health and our life. One way to reduce stress by being aware of things we cannot control, that are out of our hands, accepting that there´s nothing we can do and stop focusing on them, instead focus and work on the ones we do have control and make sure we do our best.
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