Have you ever been criticized? I bet you´ve been, we´ve all been criticized by how we look, the clothes we wear, what we do or don´t do, our job, how we spend our money and time, etc. We´ve always been criticized and people will continue doing it, so I rather work for living the life I dream and be criticized for being so ambitious and obsessive than for being mediocre.
We´re living in an era where if we do things differently we´re wrong, we need to follow rules if we want to fit in and even when we go with the flow we still get criticized by someone who wants to see us fail.
There are 2 types of criticism, constructive and destructive even when constructive criticism helps us grow and improve it hurts when someone tell us the truth, it´s hard to accept the opinion of someone else and take an honest look at ourselves or our work but there lies the seed of creativity and grow if we´re opened to new ideas our mind starts thinking and analyzing to find ways to improve.
Destructive criticism almost always come from people who want to see us fail, we all know when someone is criticizing everything we do and say just to leave a bad impression of us with others, to ruin our work whether it´s at school or job, to put someone against us, the intention is to create some harm and it can risk our job or reputation but the greatest impact is on self-esteem. A lot of people enjoy making fun of others and putting people down but in most cases when someone criticize us to make us feel bad it only reflects their insecurities, that says a lot of the other person.
When we´re being criticize what we can do is stay calm, if we start arguing we´re giving power to the other person, by remaining calm we lower that power, we also need to know and realize that they can´t make us feel bad, our mood and emotions depend of us, they are internal and nothing outside can affect that. We can also thank them, when they say something against us with the goal of hurting us, we can just say “thanks”, “thanks for your comment”, “thanks for bringing that on”.
When we´re working on our goal, if we are ambitious, obsessive and take massive action people will criticize, this is normal and we need to accept it, actually it´s a good signal that we´re on the right track if we´re not criticized it means that we´re not thinking big enough and probably we will stay in the same mediocre place we are right now so let those critiques count.
If we believe in ourselves and in our project there´s nothing that can stop us, we may fall ad get up, we will face many challenges but we got everything we need and when someone criticize what we´re doing we need to first think if it´s constructive or destructive, if they´re telling us something that can help us improve or if they´re doing it to harm our results and hurt us.
If there´s something we can learn then we take the lesson and continue, if it´s not then we just move on. We can´t take everything personal because if we do everything negative that people say about us will affect us, criticism help us gain strength by knowing that we will always face both types but how it affects us depends of us.
There´s an important action we can take today and it´s stop criticizing with the intention to hurt, we´ve all done it more than once so if we plan to do it with the intention to hurt someone´s reputation or someone´s feelings then avoid it. If we´re doing it with the intention to help our friend, we just need to be careful of how we say it. Words have an incredible power, they can hurt or they can help, we can lift someone just by what we say so instead of criticizing we will do much better if we try to understand the other person´s situation and point of view.
If you always receive criticism then what you can do is figure out if that criticism can help you improve and grow, if you can learn from it then take it and use it to improve your work or grow as a person if there´s nothing useful then ignore it. Do not take things too personal and remember that when someone is criticizing you or your work it´s more a reflect about that person than it is about you or what you´re doing.
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